Chaotic Crew:Campaign/Chapter 07

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Note: This log is still in IRC format, and may be awkward to read as a result.

Chapter 7:

"As we join our heroes, we find Man-Wolf, Wonderboy, and...

", I mean...we fine Wolfgang, Reginar, and Credance preparing to head out."

Eleihoff: "As long as I don't have to wear rainbow spandex again."

--Erase that last line if you would, Liz. *pays five bucks*

As Wolfgang hoists himself up on his horse, the door to Saffron's tower suddenly opens again. The sage appears from the doorway.

Wolfgang: "Yes, Saffron? What is it?" Wolfgang sits in the saddle, taking up the reins and sitting easily.

"Hey! You forgot this!" He steps back a bit...

*shh-THOOMP!* With a mighty kick, Eleihoff is sent sailing out through the doorway, landing roughly at the Party's collective feet.

Eleihoff: "Hello. Had a nice night, everyone?"

Reginar: "Lad! Where have ya and yer little toad been? Ya missed breakfast!"

*shh-THOOMP!* A slightly weaker kick sends Eleihoff's familiar - now a toad - sailing through the air as well. It lands squarely on his looks around, and makes a *brrrrp* noise.

Reginar erases that line too.

Wolfgang: "Well, get your transports and let's go... what do you think our next stop should be, Reginar?"

Eleihoff gets up and brushes himself off. "I missed breakfast? Oh, dear." he stands there for a moment. "What do you mean, toad?"

Eleihoff: Then an owl flies by, landing not far from Eleihoff. It scrambles over and settles right next to his leg.

Reginar: "I think we should go wherever that new contraption of yours is pointing, laddie. And... your toad, lad. The little fella ya had with ya yesterday. Although that's a nice owl there."

Eleihoff: "Yes, he is a nice owl. He's also my familiar..." Eleihoff scoops up the little bird in his arms.

Credance: "I'll meet you lot up later, if I like.

Credance disappears between some buildings.

Wolfgang stares where Credance left, then shakes his head. "It's pointing that way..." He points in the direction the arrow is pointing.

Reginar stares at the owl with some confusion. "Ah. Was the toad just a close friend, then?"

Eleihoff: "Toad? I've...never had a pet toad, if that's what you're talking about."

Reginar: "Oh. Well... all right then, lad. Nice to meet your owl." Reginar waves at the owl gamely.

Within a few minutes, Credance suddenly reappears from a back alley, riding a beautifully-groomed horse with a red ribbon tied to its mane.

Eleihoff: "You haven't met Mr. Owl? I've had him the whole time I've been with you guys..."

(A few minutes later, the judging committee is surprised to discover that the second-place winner of the third annual Cityville Horse Show is missing...)

Credance fondly strokes the glossy black neck of her new friend.

Reginar: "If ya say so, lad." Reginar blinks at Credence's new acquisition. "Didn't ya used ta have a little mare, lassie?"

Credance: "Um...

Credance: "Yeees,

Eleihoff: "Where did your little mare go, then?"

Credance: "Poor dear, she wasn't really up for a long trip so I sent her "home"

Wolfgang clip-clops down the road in the direction of the arrow, idly not-paying-attention to the area behind him, nor the area before him as the arrow leads him through a small clothing shop from the front door and out the back unloading area. He continues on as a piece of woman's undergarment finally flicks off the horse's hoof.

(A few minutes after that, the judges discover Credance's abandoned horse, and promptly award it first prize.)

Credance: "Anyway, our "Fearless Leader" is wandering off, so...

Credance nudges her pretty new gift after Wolfgang.

Reginar looks over and notices the spectacle. "Oops. Well, Elei, lad, we'd better go get our own rides back."

Eleihoff sighs. "Oh, well. Let's go get them."


Having reconvened and recovered their errant steeds, the Party is now outside the bed and breakfast, preparing to once again sally forth.

Credance plays cats cradle with some string she found in her pocket.

Reginar nudges his pony into a trot. "Lead on there, laddie."

Credance allows her mount to follow the others.

Eleihoff rides his pony, humming a tune to himself as his owl flies behind him.

Wolfgang: "All right, let's trans... port ourselves on out... of here." He flicks the reins and starts heading off down the road. "...Oh, and Credance, I hope you purchased that horse."

Credance: "Trade, actually.

Wolfgang: "I see." He heads off down the road, and doesn't bother to ask anything further. However, in his head, his mind rolls over and hurls disgust at this group. But, it's all subconscious.

The Party (or, rather, their horses) trot off down the road, heading back towards the main gate of town. As they ride, they pass large numbers of (re)dead zombies lying strewn throughout the streets, having fallen where they stood at the moment of last night's zombie-disrupting spell. Freed of the dark magic that animated them, the bodies have returned to their normal, non-shambling state...and along with it, their previous levels of decay. The stench.

Is almost unbearable.

Reginar: "I don't envy the janitors in this city."

Credance quirks a small smile and whispers something under her breath, something along the lines of. "wouldst thou who art listening at the moment give this stick wedged guy a taste of your power?"

Wolfgang: "Smells like home cooking. When you're mom's a lich reanimating zombies, I suppose."

Eleihoff and his pony continue to trot along the road, ignorant to the goings-on, save for the horrible stench.

As Credance mumbles, an invisible divine aura settles on Wolfgang. As he gazes at the compass (for the sake of brevity, we'll just call it a compass from now on instead of "the device"), he suddenly has an intrinsic knowledge of where it points: Villageburg.

Wolfgang: "Wow, we're headed straight to Villageburg!" He looks up at the sign they are passing as he says this. 'Villageburg, 10 miles' it proclaims in huge letters. "Yeah."

Reginar: "Nice to see... yer on the ball, laddie."

Eleihoff: "It's good to see that we actually know what we're doing."

The gate guard waves to you as you pass by with one hand, while the other holds his nose shut. "Looks like the zombie problem is over, but gah! It'll take weeks to clean all this up!" He kicks a nearby zombie corpse, muttering angrily.

Credance looks shocked for a moment and then yells up at the sky, "Oh. Come ON! Is that the best you could do?!!"

Eleihoff: "Uhhh...most of us, anyway."

Wolfgang: "Something wrong, Credance?" He turns and looks at her ranting. "I mean, just reading a sign, after all."

Credance: "Uh...

Credance: "Just praying.

Credance: "It is what we Clerics do best.

Reginar: "Well... it's always good for a squad to do their best, I agree..."

Wolfgang: "Oh. Keep up the good work, then. You're a valuable asset to the team, of course." He smiles and turns back eyes- forward, and starts whistling a jaunty tune.

Credance: "Oh gods! Stop that before I start throwing magic rocks at you.

Wolfgang: "Magic rocks? Fortune and glory?" He does stop whistling, though. "You should see what I can do with bagpipes."

Reginar: "Bagpipes! Now there's a noble instrument."

Credance: "When played well."

Eleihoff: "Bagpipes? It's been a long time since I've heard that. Let's see if we can pick up a set in Villageburg."

Wolfgang: "Does your grandpa have a set of bagpipes in there, Reginar?"

Credance: "I'll see just so long as I don't have to hear what you do to them.

Reginar: "Hmm. Well, give me back the hand mirror, and let's see, lad."

Wolfgang: "Eleihoff has it."

Reginar: "Hmm. Well, let's have Elei give me back the hand mirror, and let's see, laddie."

Eleihoff: "Oh, I still have that?" Eleihoff quickly digs up said mirror, and looks at his reflection for a few moments before handing it back.

Reginar takes the mirror and places it back in the Grandpa Bag. Then, after a few moments, he says, "Well, Grandpa, do ya maybe have a set of heavenly bagpipes in there for us?"

Credance: "My +2 elven ears are going to be the end of me one day....

Reginar reaches into the bag...

Reginar: You pull out...a roll of silvery tape.

Eleihoff: "Ooo, tape!"

A small tag on the roll reads:

Wolfgang: "Let me guess... in case of bad music, tape Wolfgang's mouth shut?"

"BobCo(tm) brand Nad's Hamster Tape - for all your hamster-binding needs."

Reginar: "Well, it's not bagpipes, but it is heavenly, in the sense that it has a light side and a not-so-light side and holds the hamsters together."

Reginar hands the tape to Wolfgang.

Wolfgang tosses it into the air and catches it. "...I just don't see any hamsters that need binding, so I'll just hand it back to you, Reginar." He offers the tape back.

Reginar shrugs and takes the tape back. "Well, ya never know when binding hamsters might be useful."

Reginar tucks the tape in a pocket.

Wolfgang continues down the road toward Villageburg, wondering how long it's going to take to arrive.

Credance: "Sounds like a party game...

Just as Wolfgang wonders this, the Party rounds a bend...a wooden sign comes into view. "VILLAGEBURG: 30 MINUTE WAIT FROM THIS POINT."

Wolfgang: "So... do we need to wait thirty minutes? Or is that if there's a huge line from here? Is there a roller coaster at the end?"


The Party crests a hill, to see the sprawling town-scape of Villageburg spread out before them.

Wolfgang: "Oh, there it is."

Villageburg appears, for all intents and purposes, to be a single, vast expanse of suburb. Dozens and dozens of identical houses, with identical laws surrounded by identical white picket fences, are arranged in the precise, rigid manner typical of planned communities.

Cobblestone streets are arranged between the buildings in a grid-like manner; in front of each house is a small wooden box with a slot suspended on a pole. A few unique-looking buildings protrude from the suburbial sea in various places.

Reginar: "Hmm. Apparently Villageburg only employs one architect."

Credance shudders.

Credance: "So...

Credance: "Lawful

Credance: "I think I'm going to be sick....

Reginar: "Nothing wrong with lawful, lassie. Though admittedly, a large number of dwellings devoid of clan decorations is a little... unsettling."

Wolfgang: "Looks fairly... standardized."

Credance: "It's like something out of the gray plane of Better Homes and Gardens...

Several moments pass. Then, a thunderous bang rips through the area, as a massive explosion erupts from one of the identical houses several rows into the town.

Eleihoff: "Ah, looks like they haven't conformed."

Reginar blinks, then says, "So, ah, which of these houses does our device say the next key is at, laddie?"

Credance: "Ooooo!

Credance: "Pretty....

Wolfgang: "I..." He looks at the arrow.

A high-pitched whistle is heard...a large chuck of flaming wood comes flying through the air from the direction of the blast, landing point-first directly in front of Wolfgang's horse. The plank continues to smolder at the other end.

Wolfgang: The arrow points directly towards the center of town. Lucky you.

Wolfgang: Pulling his horse up short, Wolfgang frowns, and gently directs the horse around the chunk. "Just at the middle of town. We're going to have to get into town to get more details." He continues on, this time at a hastened pace.

Reginar follows along, watching for pieces of falling house.

Eleihoff follows along, as if nothing ever blew up. He's probably used to it.

Wolfgang: You lead the Party down the path, and into the fringes of town. The identical rows are definitely creepy; though they all seem to be sequentially numbered; at least it's easy to find your way around. The smoking crater of...whatever just exploded lies you draw closer to it, you can make out sounds of angry shouting.

Credance looks about for some source of flying explosives.

Credance: "*before heading down*

Wolfgang: "Let's see... angry shouting... exploding houses... sounds like a party. Let's go!" He kicks his horse a little to get closer to the noise.

Eleihoff: "I'm up for it." Eleihoff keeps pace with Wolfgang.

Reginar: "Maybe there's something we can do ta help." Reginar follows along.

Credance: "And we care because.....?

Wolfgang: "Because I want to see another explosion."

Eleihoff: "A noble cause."

Reginar: "Because if you had just exploded yer house, you'd want someone to help ya, wouldn't ya?"

Credance: "Not from the inside, right?

Credance: "Why would I? all the work of blowing it up would already be done.

Wolfgang looks for A) The house that blew up and B) where the arrow is pointing.

Reginar: "That's an... interesting train of logic, lassie."

Wolfgang: A is directly in front of you, a couple of blocks away. B is somewhere beyond and slightly to the right of A.

Wolfgang: "Well, let's hurry and see if they have any more explosives left." He urges his horse to move faster.

Reginar follows the fearless leader.

The shouting grows the blast crater looms into view, you can see what appears to be a small-scale battle. Several humans armed with longbows are lined up on either side of the street; the ones on the left are dressed in magenta battle fatigues, while the right-hand ones are wearing burgundy mimetic uniforms. they all appear to be (badly) taking cover behind the picket fences lining the yards; every so often, one of them stands up and fire.

An arrow at the other group.

Eleihoff: "Exciting."

Wolfgang: "Hey, cool! What is this, a recreation of the historic 'battle of Villageburg' that nobody's ever heard of?"

Reginar: "Very strange."

Both groups are screaming obscenities at each other, while letting off arrows...however, both sides also appear to be badly in need of target practice, as neither side seems able to actually hit anyone. Well, almost...a lucky shot from the burgundies strikes a magenta in the shoulder, sending him falling backwards, clawing at his arm and screaming in pain.

Wolfgang: "Hold, citizens-soldiers! What is the problem which has resulted in this combat?"

The lucky archer jumps up and laughs. "HA! Take that, anarchist scum! Ow!" He falls to the ground sporting a new forehead ornament that resembles the rear half of an arrow shaft.

At the sound of Wolfgang's voice, both sides spontaneously stop firing. They glance at the Party, glance at each other, glance at the opposing forces, then glance back at Wolfgang with angry expressions.

Wolfgang: "Perhaps, if you'd be so kind, we could just dilly our dally past your lines without being injured, I'd greatly appreciate it."

Credance: "Oh no!

Credance: "The anarchists have a bomb!

They stare...then. every soldier on each side suddenly bring their bows to bear on Wolfgang. 'It's enemy spies!" "Sympathizers!" "Communists!"

Credance ducks and endeavors to hide behind Wolfgang.

Reginar: "Now, look, how can we be spies if you're both pointing arrows at us?"

Credance: "It's the Red Menace!

Eleihoff: ", triple agents?"

Reginar: "Yer not helping, lad."

Wolfgang leans against the neck of his horse. "I really could care less about your little battle, but we're here to find an artifact." Wolfgang turns to Reginar and whispers, "Run."

The apparent leaders of the magentas and burgundies glare at each other. "Are these guys with you?" "No, are they yours?" " do I know you're not lying?" "How do I know you're not lying?"

"Hey, I asked you first!" "No you didn't!" "Yes I did!" "No you didn't!"

Reginar whispers back, "Good idea, laddie," and attempts to ride past the soldiers while they're distracted with arguing.

Wolfgang waits for everyone else to pass and moves to pull up the rear.

Credance: "Well I for one am definitely lying.

Eleihoff rides after Reginar, humming a tune the whole time.

"Ah-HAH! See, she admits it! She's lying!"

Eleihoff: "Lying about WHAT?" Eleihoff pipes up.

"But if she's lying, doesn't that mean she's lying about lying?"

Wolfgang: "You two aren't HELPING..."

Eleihoff: "How can I be sure you're not lying?"

"I don't know, maybe she's lying about that too..."

Credance ducks between the nearest houses to get away from the insanity and onto the next street.

Wolfgang heads, last, after the other two, and checks his arrow again.

The two leaders continue to argue nonsensically, their banter seeming more like some sort of mindless ritual than anything meaningful.

Eleihoff: "...what was that about?"

Reginar: "Not sure, lad."

Wolfgang: You check the compass again as the Party reassembles next to you. The arrow points off down a street to your right, farther towards the heart of the suburbs.

Eleihoff: "Maybe we should ask them..."

Credance: "Residential code dispute.

Wolfgang: "Maybe it's a Neighborhood Watch meeting." Wolfgang follows the arrow.

The yelling between the two armies quickly degenerates into insults behind you. Shortly thereafter, the arrows start flying again.

Credance: "I've seen it once before.

Credance: "There were burnt out miniwagons everywhere....

Wolfgang: You follow the arrow (it shows you where to go) down the street a ways, watching it slowly change direction to the left. You turn off onto a street identical to the one you were just on, and go a bit farther, until the arrow dictates a right turn onto another identical street. And another, and another, until you start to become outright sick of freshly-mown lawns, white picket fences, and the occasional pink flamingo lawn ornament.

Eleihoff: "I think I miss the crazy archers."

Wolfgang: As you progress, you realize that the arrow is leading you towards one of the non-identical buildings you saw before; a squarish, official-looking building near the center of town. As you round a corner, however, you see something else as well.

Wolfgang: "Hmm..."

A huge, hulking, vaguely humanoid demon is standing hunched over something to the side of the street, a little ways away from you. He's easily twelve feet tall...his body is entirely black, and strange, ethereal flames wreathe his body, licking at his extremities like smoke.

Wolfgang: "Think we can lure that guy into the middle of the Neighborhood Watch meeting back there?"

Reginar: "That's not a bad idea, laddie."

He notices the Party approaching, and turns to face you. As he does so, you see that he's wearing what appears to be an equally large light blue shirt, and navy blue shorts. A brown satchel is slung over his shoulder.

Eleihoff waves at the creature. "Hello."

Wolfgang: "Oh, maybe he's just a traveling demonic salesman. Selling souls for shoes, or something." Wolfgang hails this creature, hoping he's more intelligent and less stupid than the Neighborhood Watch. "Hello, stranger!"

Credance: "Greeting, Postman.

The demon blinks at seems to recognize her. Slowly, it plods up the street towards the Party, its feet leaving flaming footprint-shaped scorch marks embedded in the cobblestones.

Reginar: "Well, and I thought Dwarven postmen were a bit frightening."

Wolfgang checks the arrow again.

Credance: "What drives you to this place?

Wolfgang: The arrow points off past the demon, at the same building as before.

The creature stomps forward. *STOMP, STOMP, STOMP* It walks past Wolfgang, ignoring him completely, and comes to a stop in front of Credance. It reaches a huge, meaty hand into its satchel, rummages around...and produces a letter.

"MAIL." It holds the letter out to Credance.

Wolfgang quietly continues on to the building, hoping not to attract any attention.

Eleihoff: "Ooooo, mail!"

Credance: "Ah, thank you.

Reginar: "Who's it from, lassie?"

Credance digs around in her pocket and pulls out a lump of brimstone, "for the trip home."

Credance takes the letter and looks it over.

The demon takes the lump without a word.

Credance: Sure enough, the envelope is addressed to you, written in a beautiful flowing script.

Credance: "Hmm.

Credance: "Nice penmanship,

Wolfgang starts examining the building in detail.

Eleihoff: "Ooo! Ooo! What's it say?" Eleihoff says, bouncing around behind Credance.

Credance slides a fingernail along the top edge to open it.

Credance: You open the envelope, pull the letter out, and read it. It says: "STEALING HORSES IS NOT NICE." You barely have time to register the significance of this before the letter promptly explodes in your face.


Credance: "...

Eleihoff: "Odd. In my experience, letters don't explode very often."

Credance: "Well, DUH.

Credance: "Of course it's not nice!

Credance: The "blast", such as it is, is more like a low-grade firecracker than anything else. It does singe your fingers pretty badly, though.

Wolfgang sits on his horse examining the building some more. "You guys okay back there?"

Reginar: "The lassie seems to have gotten a letter from someone who prepared Explosive Runes this morning."

At the sound of Wolfgang's voice, the demon turns around...slowly, it clomps over to him, and begins to rummage in its satchel. "MAIL."

Eleihoff: "It seems like everyone's getting a letter...except for me..."

It produces a brown-paper package about a foot wide and half as high, and holds it out to Wolfgang.

Wolfgang slowly takes the package. "Um... is this going to explode?"

Reginar: "I have ta admit, I'm not sure I'd want this sort of letter, lad."

Credance sucks her fingers.

Eleihoff: "Actually, I'm used to things exploding in my face. You've seen me cast spells, haven't you?"

Reginar: "...this is true."

Credance: "Bet it's a puppy.

Eleihoff: "In a package? Does it even have airholes? Is it a demon puppy? Can I pet it?"

The mail demon looks expectantly at Wolfgang. "MAIL."

Reginar: "Well, uh... as dangerous as the package might be, keeping a daemon from Hell waiting probably isn't very safe either."

Wolfgang rips open the package and tosses it away from him, aiming at the nearest soft surface that isn't alive.

Credance: "He's not from Hell, per se....

Reginar: "No?"

Credance: "He just travels there a lot.

Reginar: "Ah."

Wolfgang: You pitch the box away, just in time...*KABOOM!* A thunderous boom echoes through the area, as it explodes into a million pieces, blowing a small crater in somebody's lawn, and vaporizing a flamingo.

Eleihoff: "Do demon puppies explode?"

The demon turns to look at the carnage, then looks back at Wolfgang. It reaches into its satchel, and produces another package, identical to the first. "MAIL." It seems a bit more...insistent, this time.

Reginar: "Lassie... are ya sure this is a postdemon and not a very odd assassin demon?"

Wolfgang: "...well, hopefully there wasn't anything useful in there." He looks up at the post demon. "Why are you giving me exploding boxes?"

Eleihoff: "Why not?"

Credance: "He just delivers to people on the list.

"MAIL." The demon prods the box against your stomach.

Eleihoff: "Why is HE on the list twice, then?"

Reginar: "And why is all our mail exploding?"

Wolfgang takes THIS package, then immediately rips it open, glances inside and likely chucks it away from himself if it has more explosives in it.

Wolfgang: You open the package...yep, it's a bomb. A really obvious one, too, with a bundle of dynamite wired to a cheap alarm clock, ticking loudly, with a flashing red light to further indicate its bomb-ness. You quickly pitch it away just in time... *BOOM!*

Wolfgang: "...Someone REALLY doesn't like me. Any idea WHO, Mr. Maildemon?"

Chunks of grass and a few lawn gnomes fly overhead from the explosion.

Eleihoff: "They have...lawn gnomes? This place is just getting stranger."

Credance: "There's nothing wrong with keeping a few household idols around.

The demon frowns angrily...he's getting really annoyed now. He reaches into the satchel and produces another copy of the package, this time holding it up as if to smash you over the head with it. "MAIL!" He growls.

Reginar: "I hope there aren't any temples to Groglar around here."

Wolfgang: "Reginar, take the compass and go find the key thing... I'll deal with the explosive mail." He hands the device off to Reginar, takes this package, rips it open and tosses it away.

Reginar: "Aye, laddie, good luck." Reginar takes the compass and goes off to try to find the key before Wolfgang becomes Roast Human.

Credance: "Wolfy, perhaps you should mark it "Return to Sender".

Eleihoff: "How many of those package bombs do you HAVE?" Eleihoff turns to the demon.

Wolfgang: "Not a bad idea, Credance." He pulls out a writing utensil and waits for the next one.

Eleihoff: "But it might be the one with the demon puppy!"

Wolfgang: The demon seems outright ready to start smashing heads now. He produces a fourth package, and is just about to shove it down your throat when you snatch it away from him. Apparently appeased, he waits for you to open it.

Wolfgang quickly writes "RETURN TO SENDER" in large, bold letters on the package and hands it back to the demon. "Here you go. Please return this with all due haste."

Wolfgang: The demon looks at the box, then looks up at you. It blinks its eyes once, twice...then, shrugs, puts the box back in the satchel, turns around, and slowly lumbers off down the street.

Wolfgang smiles, then turns to Credance. "Thank you." He offers his hand for a handshake.

Reginar is still off following the compass.

Credance: "No problem,

Credance extends her hand but chooses to squeeze a body part other than Wolfgang's hand.

Wolfgang: He definitely blushes, stammers for a moment, then heads after Reginar, still blushing.

Eleihoff: "Hmm." Eleihoff then rides after Reginar and Wolfgang, muttering about demon puppies.

Reginar: While the others are dealing with the Mailman from Hell, you follow the compass through more identical streets. Before long, you find yourself standing before a large, official-looking building, made of white marble. The other party members catch up to you as you ponder it.

Wolfgang: "Ahem... find anything, Reginar?"

Reginar looks over from studying the building. "Everything go all right, laddie?"

Wolfgang: "Yeah, we returned it to sender... Credance's idea."

Reginar: "Ah, well done, lassie! I wonder what that was all about, though."

Wolfgang: "I suspect that the wizard who cursed my weapon sent the mail bombs. Although I didn't know he was the unibomber."

Credance: "Quadruplebomber.

Wolfgang: "No, each one was a single bomb inside."

Eleihoff: "He didn't send anything for me, though." Eleihoff said, then lowered his head a bit.

Wolfgang: "You haven't ticked off anyone but us enough yet, Eleihoff." Wolfgang examines the building.

Eleihoff: "Yet."

Credance: "It's good to have goals, Kid.

Reginar: "Well, we might as well go in the building."

Credance tries the door.

Wolfgang: The building looks like it might have been the city hall at one point. However, all the identifying markings you'd expect from a civic building have been removed; in their place, several hand-drawn banners bearing the letters "UAA" are tacked up around the place.

Wolfgang: "United Anarchists of... Anywhere?" He shrugs and heads to the door to try and enter himself.

Credance and Wolfgang step up to the opens slowly, creaking from neglect. Beyond it is a lobby typical of civic buildings everywhere...that is to say, large, opulent, and wasteful of the taxpayers' money. Twin hallways at the far end lead off to the rest of the first floor, while a bank of elevators in the back presumably lead to higher floors.

Wolfgang: "Reginar, could you hand me that compass back?"

Eleihoff rides up to the building, nearly going through the door before remembering to dismount.

Reginar: "Of course." Reginar hands back the compass.

Reginar then dismounts, ties up his horse, and heads inside himself.

Wolfgang: You check the compass again...the arrow is now pointing almost directly up. The portal key must be on one of the upper floors.

Credance: "After you.

Wolfgang: "Upstairs. Let's find some stairs or somesuch." He starts looking for a way up.

Eleihoff ties up his pony with a messy knot and then wanders after the group, looking in absent-minded awe at the building.

Credance tries the elevator.